welcome to the third trimester

Several nights ago, I was at a lipsense party and trying on the millionth color of the night. I never wear makeup, so deciding on a lip color was ... hard. Am I picking an everyday color even though I'm not an everyday-lipstick-wearer? Am I picking a every-once-in-a-while color which basically means the tube of lipstick will last me several years? Thankfully, I have good friends who know about makeup and told me what to do. I ended up with an everyday color as well as a bit of an intense color. But the best part about the whole night was when I had this intense color (Rhubarb) on and Sara said, "Claire, you need that color! That's what I picture you in! Your black and white stripes, glasses, fun lip color, and blogging!" This has made me laugh intermittently throughout the past weeks for lots of reasons, but one being because I hardly ever blog anymore.

I really like blogging and, trust me, there have been plenty of #thingstosay about life, but once I arrive at the coveted naptime each day, I find other things to do. But I'm making/letting myself blog today so I can share a little life update.

Colt and I just got back from our babymoon in NYC. It has always been a dream to go with him (one more thing crossed off my 30x30 list!), but even more so since seeing "Waitress" back in May. I wanted so badly to see it with him. He surprised me with plane tickets for my birthday in July and we finally got to make that dream, along with many others, come true this past week.

I'm so thankful we got some solid time together before this little baby girl comes in March. We slept in, had brunch, explored, took evening naps, and had conversations that were completely interruption-free. I really love this guy.

Grand Central Station

The New York Public Library

"Wicked"

"Waitress"

Stardust Diner

The 9/11 National Memorial Museum

Joe's Pizza

SNL Dress Rehearsal

On the SNL stage

Rockefeller Tree

Central Park

But I need to back up for the sake of the documentation of this pregnancy. Somewhere around 15-16 weeks, the nausea stopped, the exhaustion let up, my energy level shot up, and I was able to eat (and enjoy) food in my house again. But man, that first trimester was hard stuff. I felt sick, had lots of headaches, dealt with a sinus infection (my first ever), and had a constant list of things I absolutely could not eat and things I desperately had to put in my mouth within the next 30 seconds or I'd melt. But I survived. I made it through with the help of chicken noodle soup, naps, lots of eating out, Colt (who basically ran this household because I felt paralyzed when it came to chores and preparing food), and Sara Groves.

So take up what we’ve been given
Welcome the edge of our days
Hemmed in by sunrise and sunset
By our youth and by our age
Thank God for our dependence
Here’s to our chasm of need
And how it binds us together
In faith and vulnerability

This cup, this cup
I wanna drink it up
To be right here in the middle of it
Right here, right here
This challenging reality
Is better than fear or fantasy

Listening to these words reminded me that this season of feeling sick and exhausted while taking care of two children would only last for so long and that I could still find beauty in a challenging reality. I was still grumpy and unendlessly hungry and just had to have fries and a malt to survive the day many times, but there was also a calm knowing that this was all still a wonderful thing - to be pregnant with two other little people running around, reminding me what all of this was for.

Finding out our little babe was a girl was so much fun, but no surprise at all. I mean, honestly, we all knew it was a girl. In fact, when we told Duke, he was a little frustrated. "Mom! I told you it was a girl this whole time!" And it's true, he did. I'm so excited for Duke to be a big brother to two precious girls and I can't wait to see Nova fill her new big sister/middle child role.

 

A couple of weeks ago, I failed my glucose test and had to take the 3 hour one. It felt pretty devastating to me because I didn't fail with Duke or Nova. I thought something might've really been different this time. Thinking about watching what I ate for the duration of this pregnancy sounded like absolute doom. I was so relieved to find out I passed the 3 hour test and that all of my levels were completely normal.

Although I have definitely noticed how different things are being 30 and carrying baby #3, I'm still feeling great. I have always loved being pregnant and this time is no different. I am aware of the crazy blessing that it is and am very grateful.

As for now, I'm 28 weeks and my mind and days are occupied with my "Before the Baby Comes" to-do list, which has already included an exciting room change-up for the kiddos as they now share a room. It has had its challenges, but sleep is something we take very seriously in this house. We try to give grace and let the fun of sleeping in the same room run its course, but we also try to keep the shenanigans to a minimum. It's been around a month now and I think we've all adjusted pretty well.

Other than that, our to-do list includes things like building extra shelves in the kids' closet so we can add Nova's clothes in with Duke's, putting the crib up, getting the nursery ready, and many other miscellaneous things that are completely non-urgent and unnecessary in order for the baby to come but that seem like emergencies to me. Ah, nesting. I love it. It's like an excuse to be my naturally crazy self about getting things done. Of course, it feels overwhelming at times, but it's also so exciting to be making room for a new member of our family. I don't think I ever imagined living in this house with 3 kids, but here we are and we're going to make it work!

Just as suspected, this pregnancy has gone by a lot faster than the other two simply because my days are busier and fuller. And with the holidays coming up, the new year will be here before I know it. And from there, it's baby shower, final preparations, and, of course, the waiting for her to come, which is my favorite part of all.

carlton landing getaway

A few months ago, I received an email asking me if we'd like to have a free overnight stay at Carlton Landing.  I'd been dreaming of visiting Carlton Landing for the past several months after seeing pictures here and there from various friends' social media accounts.  So this was a no-brainer.

We dropped the kids off at my parents' house on Friday and when we arrived at Carlton Landing, we were assigned a beautiful cottage.

Since the food truck at Carlton Landing was already closed, we ran into town, bought some groceries for the next day, and grabbed some Braum's.  Although it felt a little funny that our "romantic dinner" was a burger and fries, it didn't matter because we were eating it in new, fancy surroundings.  After dinner, we played some Egyptian War, went to the hot tub, and then got in bed and watched TV.  (We don't have a TV in our room at home so this is always a treat!)

We woke up Saturday morning to the sun shining through our windows.  Colt made coffee and we stayed in bed as we drank our first cup of the day.  Then we had sausage, eggs, toast, and mimosas on the porch.  The view was beautiful, the scene was quiet, and the weather was unbelievably perfect.

If you're looking for a getaway, as a couple or as a family, this is your place.  We really do hope to go back someday and bring the kiddos along!

Carlton Landing

Facebook // Instagram // Twitter // Pinterest

our trip to maui

A few weeks ago, my parents took all of us on a vacation to Maui.  Our first time there was back in 2010 when we were 2 years into marriage, had zero kids, and had better bodies.  This time, all of those things were different.  We had some choices to make as far as children were concerned.  We decided we'd take Duke but that we'd leave Nova with Colt's parents.  I knew that the long flights paired with the time change would make it pretty non-vacationy for all of us if Nova was there.  Plus, there's no containing that little 14-month-old, especially on the beach.  (And I doubt she'd even be able to handle any beach time with her snow white skin.)

Leading up to this vacation was exciting but was not void of an internal battle.  I have never been away from either child for 9 days.  And being that far away made it feel even worse.  I couldn't run home or get to her if I needed to.  I think one of the hardest things to discern after dealing with anxiety is whether or not something is giving you a bad feeling because of your own fear or because the Spirit is stirring it within you.  I prayed a lot on my own and received a lot of prayer leading up to this vacation.  I was fearful of a lot of things and I didn't want to end up in a panicked situation.  Yet, I didn't want to make the wrong choice by not going.

I told Colt one night that asking a person who has struggled with anxiety to get on a plane, which will be traveling over water a lot of the time, and be away from their baby for 9 days was like asking for the worst possible outcome.  To anyone else, passing up on a Maui vacation sounded crazy.  But to me, saying yes to this scenario sounded even crazier.

Ultimately, I knew that my hesitation was birthed from fear, not from a bad feeling from legitimate discernment.  All of my concerns started with a "What if," which is never a solid place to start.  I knew that if I found a way to dodge this trip, I was forfeiting a chance to be courageous and trust in the Lord.  I was missing a chance to surrender and give up control. 

Thank the Lord, the trip was uneventful (in a good way) and while I had to manage my anxiety a bit more for those 9 days than normal, I felt fine.  I enjoyed my vacation and am so grateful we got some time away.

Highlights of the trip:

Date night with Colt //  We got the chance to slip away one evening for dinner and a long talk on the beach.

Duke learning how to swim // He's no pro, but this was the first time he'd ever swam without his vest or puddle-jumper.  He became quite the doggy paddler!

Deep tissue massage //  Holy moly.  I've had normal massages, but never a deep tissue massage.  It was so painful and it was so good.

Meeting a sweet family at the pool //  Duke started playing with a little kid named King at the pool.  I mean, how fun is that - Duke and King.  Through that, we met King's parents and found out his dad is a worship pastor in Washington.  He uses the pedals that Walrus Audio makes (where Colt works) and she's a mom of 3.  We had a lot in common and it was really neat to connect.

Praying with one of our waitresses //  One of our waitresses was having some problems with her hand, so Colt and I prayed for her when our meal was done.  It was a really sweet moment.  I could tell she was encouraged at the end of it.  I know we definitely were.

The daily routine //  Because of the time change, we naturally went to bed early and woke up early.  This trip was great proof that "early to bed and early to rise is the way to be healthy and wealthy and wise."  I read, exercised, journaled, and prayed almost every day.  (Which is something I want to do every day at home, but I'm just not as disciplined with following through on all of it.)  It was so refreshing.

Time with just Duke //  We got to spend quality time with just Duke and that was wonderful.  When you take away one sibling, it's amazing what you can learn.  It was an absolute joy to put all of our energy into him, his questions, his stories, and his needs.  Along with that, and probably because of that, we barely had any behavior problems.  Back here, Nova got the same kind of one-on-one focus from her Mimi and Pappaw.

 

It was such a great time.

And then you get home and realize the potatoes have leaked onto the floor, your house smells, and you've gained 4 pounds.  Eesh!  Oh well - it was all worth it!

all i wanna do is have some fun

"California, here we cooooome"

Last week, we went to California and it was my first time ever.  (I get to mark it off my 30x30 list!)  My earliest opinions of California were based on that little earthquake simulator that we had in the Omniplex (now Science Museum) when I was a kid.  I would step in that little box-like contraption, watch a video of streets splitting in half, and feel the ground shake below me.  I knew as a 6 year old that I would never live in California if it meant dodging cracks and falling buildings all my life.  But then, shows like California Dreams and Laguna Beach lightened my mood and redeemed it.  Maybe people aren't avoiding earthquakes 24/7 in California.  Maybe it's a ridiculously gorgeous place with perfect weather where I can see mountains and beach at the same time.  Yes, that's what it is.

We met up with our Portland friends, the Watsons, and all 8 of us stayed in a 4-bedroom home for the week.  We spent the majority of our time outside in the backyard with the three-nagers, babies, and fresh fruit growing from trees (oranges and lemons and grapefruit, oh my).

We had several outings to the beach throughout the week as well as a visit to the aquarium.

About 4 years ago, the 4 of us - Brad, Mirela, Colt, and I - sat in our living room and, unknowingly, had prepared to tell each other the same news.  "Well, we're pregnant," came out of their mouths first.  Colt and I looked at each other with enormous eyes and just laughed.  We said, "Um ... we are too!"  It was a beautiful moment and I will never forget it.  We lived our college days side-by-side, navigated our first year of marriage together in OKC (complete with Saturday breakfasts at Old School Bagel), and have made Portland/OKC trips a priority since they moved away in 2009.  They are family to us.

We are missing them so much already, but we feel so filled up from our time spent with them.